<3 Cheers to 8 Years! <3

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We met in November, engaged in May, and were married today, 8 years ago. We’ve fought and agreed to disagree about life at times. We’ve yelled and cried and felt misunderstood. We’ve experienced hurdles and valleys that were filled with darkness and despair. But we’ve also laughter until we’ve peed ourselves (well at least I have…) 

I was told quite often before getting married that “marriage is work”, and now I’m beginning to understand that our marriage is not only work, but it’s one of the most important works in our lives. Why? Because how Devin and I are loving one another by word, action, and in deed will either positively or negatively spill over into our children’s lives and their children’s lives, and their children’s lives. How we love each other can give and leave a testament to God’s faithfulness to sustain and grow and provide. Through the Lord’s grace, we’ve endured the challenges of Devin’s traumatic brain injury and our firstborn son’s birth defect. We’ve been side by side yet face to face with deep, dark valleys. We’ve been on the brink of death but, simultaneously saw how the Lord was giving so much life. One thing Devin and I never gave up hope on was Jesus’ faithfulness. 

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Devin and I were created {for} one another as helpmates {to} one another, and Jesus remains faithful in that. Love is not self-seeking or self-focused, right? To us, this has meant throughout the years establishing a “team effort” with all things within our home and outside our home solely for the good of the other person. When one player is down or needs help, the other “picks up the slack”. When we see a player in need, we help or assist in ways that will serve them for their good, and not necessarily our own. This “team effort” doesn’t come easily and isn’t natural. It does indeed take work, learning, and experience but it’s work that if faithfully and intentionally sought out, will impact generations for our good and for God’s glory.

 

 

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Society nowadays so often views love as a feeling, rather than a choice. Making it about us, rather than about our spouse. Love is not self-seeking or self-focused, right? Marriage isn’t about what we can get, but rather what we can give. So, love, after all, isn’t really even about us… Each day we wake, we get/have the opportunity to love our spouse. Although there may be days where we are self-focused and particularly don’t want to “like them” that day… choosing to love them leaves us without excuse. Throughout the years, I’ve heard so often, “Oh, I just don’t love him/her anymore”. This kind of love is so self-focused and so feelings based. This kind of love gives the enemy such a foothold. Rather, looking at love as a choice in which we are called, by God to love leaves us with no excuse. God chose us out of love, so we also should choose our spouse, always. God chose us and continues to pursue us every day. Let us strive with intentionality to follow His example and do the same for our spouse. 

 

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Friends, I never want (nor want my family) to come across as having it “all together” because that’s the farthest from the truth. Oftentimes social media can give us a good “wrong” impression of people’s lives. Kinda just like this picture to the left, right?!

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Do we always do the above, absolutely not! I will be the first one to admit we don’t always do it right or well or even at all… We are powerless without the work/help of Christ. Just being aware of the work that needs to be done is so key. Christ has been so kind to allow these struggles in our marriage with the intent to use as teaching moments that eventually birth growth and dependence on Him. Christ’s love on the cross demonstrated a sacrificial love; a love that put us before Himself. So shouldn’t we also be striving for this same kind of love? How can Christ demonstrate His love for your spouse through you today?

Happy 8th Anniversary, Devin! I’m ready to ride the waves of whatever the Lord sets before us, just as long as we can share the same raft. ;) Love you, so! <3 

Photo Credit: @CarlyLaVigne @LiveViewStudios